Tifa Attends Damn Therapy
by Leopard Forever
Summary: My first humor story about Tifa attending her very first therapy session, and her experiences as well while further attending the sessions. It gets more humorous as the rest of the chapters develop so far.
1. Chapter 1

Tifa Goes To Her Stupid Therapy

Chapter 1: Session #1- Meeting a stony faced stranger

Looking right at her phone which directly says the exact time "1:15 pm", the same time that her new and latest therapy session is settled at, Tifa calmly and bravely walked to a nicely constructed office filled with gold chandeliers where a lobby is located at from across. Do I really have to be in this goddamn place?! Where is my freedom now? Tifa thought to herself quite bitterly. Tifa wondered to herself whether this new therapist could be really nice or downright RUDE or even HURTFUL. The real reason why Tifa had to first attend therapy was due to a confliction she had with Marlene, or presumably Cloud about some familiar issues dealing with taking good care of Marlene, or mostly lacking some quality time with Cloud. Tifa loved spending her own time with her husband, but Tifa sometimes wondered if Cloud remained stable in their relationship together. For Marlene, Tifa enjoyed her company a lot apparently, and as for Cloud Tifa wondered if she and Cloud can spend some time trying to connect with each other on a more enjoyable and emotional level.

With Cloud, however, he's very self reflective, over his own thoughts on his slight depression and somewhat painful memories of Aerith and Zack. He's either reflecting on his own personal thoughts of failing to protect Aerith or to save his dear best friend from the apparent danger that Zack went through. So yes, Cloud DOES need some type of recovery that he wants to have in order to get happier and better, for both him and Tifa too. If Cloud can come to his happier self like old times, then perhaps he and Tifa can go on to a much happier time. So that way Tifa can provide him with much support and help as well as happiness- or maybe eternal bliss!

Can Cloud however change his mood for Tifa? Or perhaps Tifa too? Tifa doesn't think so, besides she wanted a normal, happy life for her and Cloud as well. But Tifa also wanted to wonder why she needs to attend therapy of all people. Maybe it might help.. or not. Tifa had never been to therapy before, at all. So she wondered whether or not this could be good, or great for her.

Tifa kept looking at the time on her phone which says 1:10 pm, which means her therapy session is about to come up at any minute. She did felt a little bit nervous cause she never met the actual therapist before. Could her new therapist be really friendly? Or downright impolite? Tifa continued waiting in the lobby and shut off her phone just so it can save some of its battery. At at around 1:15, Tifa looked up and noticed that a woman, around the age of 49 or 50, came walking down the soft carpet across from where Tifa was sitting. Is it.. the therapist? Tifa thought to herself as she sat up from her seat. The woman was dressed in dark blue jeans, a white sleeved blouse, gray vest, and black sneakers. Tifa then said to her, "Um, hello? Um, are you the therapist that I'm supposed to attend?" The woman replied with a smile, "Why yes, Tifa, this is your therapist that you are seeing. It's so nice to meet you. My name is Amanda."

Amanda, huh? Tifa thought to herself a bit.

She also wondered if this therapist can be a little bit more of a friend to talk to for her sessions. But will it be at this point? Tifa thought again. Whatever it will be, it BETTER be good or beneficial, Tifa thought to herself. As soon as Tifa went to see her new therapist's office, it was quite an ordinary look- a coach, with some velvet chairs and a desk right around the middle center of the room. I could get used to this, Tifa thought to herself a bit wryly.

Tifa smoothly entered the room and sat calmly on the velvet couch. She then came to face her new therapist Amanda that's sitting across from her in a swivel purple chair. Purple really isn't my favorite color though, Tifa thought. She soon kept her thoughts to herself. "Um.. I'm new here, and I want to discuss this: why I am in therapy?" Tifa asked a bit nervously to Amanda, who is a bit busy jotting down notes from what Tifa had said onto a green clipboard. Amanda then said, "Let's introduce myself. I am Amanda, a clinical therapist, and you are my new patient. The goals here are for you to accomplish them, as long as they're achieved." Amanda soon replied, "Since I'm going to be your new clinical therapist for only a certain amount of time, the real reason you have to go to therapy is because you do require some sort of balance and help for your life. It's not going to be forever, but I hope that my therapeutic sessions will help you deliver a new meaning in life." Tifa simply crossed her arms across her chest. _I don't need her in my life.. or do I?_ She thought again. Pushing the thoughts aside, Tifa then said, "Hmm.. ok. Here, first, I want to talk about how I'm doing. You see.. it's like it has it's ups and downs. Like with my significant other, Cloud.. I do adore him, but I want him to get better too. I keep wanting him to see how great life is between the two of us. Catch my drift?" Tifa said, in a confident and sure manner. Amanda, finishing what she wrote down, soon said, "Hmm.. I do seem to understand your point, Tifa. You want to feel great with your loved one, and also you want him to share what you want to share with him too. You can try to get along better with him, see if he'll understand you more."

Tifa simply glared at her therapist with a blank but annoyed stare. Does she seemed to get what Tifa just told her? "Um.. no Amanda. The thing is is that, I just want Cloud to be happy. And me too in that case. I only want the best for him, that's all I ever want, really. " "Ok Tifa, but what I'm saying is that you should try other new things in order to build your bond to a flourished one." Tifa shook her head a bit. "I'll figure this one out on my own." Tifa turned to face Amanda a little quickly. "At what time do we have left for this session?" Tifa asked. "For at least thirty more minutes." Amanda replied back calmy. _Oh brother..._ Tifa thought to herself and mentally rolled her eyes. _Where's a trap door when you need it?_

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I'm hoping that I'll upload the next chapter by this early March, since I'm juggling with schoolwork and other stuff in life. PM me for details pretty please.


	2. Tifa has had it

_**Author's note: **_**Hey, this short story will only be about five chapters long, and it will get humorous as the rest of the chapters go by. Enjoy :).**

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After long and long hours of debating with her ongoing therapist about her constant struggles with the bar of Seventh Heaven, her love for Cloud and Marlene, and how to become a better role model for her family, Tifa then decides to call it quits with Amanda. "Amanda, look, I know what to do now please, I don't need anyone's permission to dictate whether what I should do with what I do with my life. Don't you think that fair?" Tifa asked solemnly and a bit annoyingly to her therapist. "Tifa, what I'm trying to say is—" With that, Tifa immediately raised to her feet before collecting her bag. "NOPE! I'm out of here!" Tifa snapped as she soon was out of her therapists door and headed downstairs to the main lobby, while her therapist was yelling at her to finish her first therapy session. Ignoring her therapists' calls, Tifa sighed to herself in frustration before closing her red eyes and trying to make herself calm down some more. Therapy truly is the worst, she thought to herself a little bit. Why do I even bother having to go there in the first place? Tifa also wondered if her mentality is stable enough to not even go to therapy at all. Every time Tifa would defend herself with her own answers, Amanda would try to go against it, since she wants Tifa to highly improve her lifestyle. But why would Tifa try to settle things down with a therapist that she hardly even know about? Does Tifa even have the right to go see a dang therapist?

I'll get to the bottom of this, Tifa thought to herself. Just you wait and see, I'll confirm that I don't really actually need therapy..

7 AM in the morning, Tifa soon woke to up to a text message that's directly from Amanda, right before she ate for breakfast. The text instantly said to meet her for therapy at 2:15 pm. What?! Again with this?! Tifa thought angrily to herself as she hung her head in shame and anger. Why do I need to see her? Just why? Maybe it's to clarify with her last therapy session last week ago. Tifa actually doesn't believe in therapists at all because she doesn't trust them or even like them at all, she's refusing to seek help for any matter whatsoever. She better not give me a hard time for once please.. Tifa thought as she got out of bed.

As soon as she got ready, she bolted out of the door, bag in hand as she stormed to her next latest therapy session. I'm soo not in the mood for this, Tifa thought. Hmm.. maybe if I skip next week's therapy session I'll finally be liberated! Or maybe not.. Tifa thought again, as she made a concerned face while she faced her therapy session schedule on her phone. Maybe today's session won't be as hard and difficult as it was before, Tifa thought to herself as she waited in the lobby for 2:15 again. Tifa sighed to herself as she sat crossed legged, arms crossed across her chest. Tifa bit her lip as she waited impatiently, but not wanting to get a hissy fit and storm out the lobby in a frustrated hurry. As soon as 2:15 hits, Amanda came to get Tifa. Tifa simply smiled a little bit uncomfortably to her therapist as she walked to the office and sat down on the sofa. "So, Tifa, feeling better? Do you want to unwind?" Tifa simply gave her a cold look before bantering out a few rants. "I don't even deserve to be here please, and besides I got better things to do than to sit here and talk bullshit with you." Amanda seemed quite shocked with her patient. "But Tifa, I'm only here to help you. We may not be friends or anything but we can see things on a much brighter level. Don't you think that's fair?" Amanda asked. Tifa simply stood and stormed out the door. I have an idea.. Tifa thought to herself as she walked outside from the office to the exit. She won't be bothering me anymore.. Tifa thought with a smirk.

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**Author's note: The next chapter will be updated until further notice, since I have writer's block and all, but it won't take long :), as long as I have some ideas.**


	3. Tifa almost reaches her breaking point

**_Author's Note: Hey guys! I'm back with Chapter 3 of this humorous cute story. Hope you'll all enjoy ._**

"WHAT?!" Tifa screamed at the top of her lungs, her breathing nearly going out of control. Her therapist just asked for another session today and yet, why at the wrong place at the wrong time? Tifa had more important things to do rather than just seeing a god damn therapist in her point of view. She just wanted to be let go, to be FREE for once in her lifetime. "Please DON'T tell me I have to see you today... I have some few stuff I have to take care of.." Tifa said right into the speaker clearly into her cell phone. She just finished her call with Amanda about a few several minutes ago and Tifa pretty much HAD enough at this rate. Tifa also wondered about the possibility of maybe **skipping **her session with her therapist, even though that's not a possibility because if she showed up as a no show, she'd be charged. LITERALLY. Tifa couldn't EVEN believe that, especially since she's working still at Seventh Heaven, her most favorite and fancy bar to attend to. Tifa even liked Seventh Heaven THAN going to therapy herself!

Seventh Heaven is possibly Tifa's therapy, her real sanctuary, since she enjoys partaking in discussions about her relationship with Cloud, Aerith, Yuffie, etc. She loved her friends cause they were like a second family to her, really. But her relationship with her therapist, Amanda? That's a whole different story right there. Tifa, as you can see, is a VERY private person when it comes to her own daily life. She does not like it when her life gets thrown in the picture like a random tabloid. Tifa DESERVES to have her own lifestyle planted by her own rules, not by anybody else's. But why on Earth is she in THERAPY of all people? Does she even deserve to go to therapy now? Does she seriously even need therapy to begin with? No, fair and square. The Tifa we all know is strong, someone who knows who is right and who is wrong, and someone who doesn't put up with her shit.

Tifa looked right at the time. _It's almost 1:15... _Tifa thought to herself, as she waited in the lobby near the couches for her next therapy session. She simply killed her boredom by just simply listening to Marlene's cute little baby cries, recordings of her and Marlene taken when Marlene was a little baby before Tifa had adopted her. Marlene is such a adorable little child, and Tifa cannot wait to see her again as soon as her therapy session is over.

_It's 1:15.._ Tifa thought as she waited for Amanda to come pick her up. In the next two minutes, Amanda had finally came in through the lobby hallway. She was dressed in a light blue summer dress and sky blue flats, while Tifa had a leather tank top over leopard print jeans. "Hello there Tifa," Amanda said as she approached Tifa with a light smile. "Hi.." Tifa said back with some boredom in her tone. "Can't we just get this over with?" Tifa said as she and Amanda walked to the door across from the hallway. "Sure Tifa, as long as whatever's on your mind," Amanda said as she closed the door while she and Tifa sat down.

"Listen, Amanda," Tifa said in a confident tone, "I don't think going to therapy is really helping me this time. I just think it's freakin pointless. Don't you agree?"

"Well Tifa, I'm here to discuss your goals so we can go over and complete them as you progress. I'm only here trying to help and also we are not friends."

_Not friends? _Tifa thought to herself. _That's it.. that's the last straw! _

"Well.. get this Amanda. I don't want to go to see you anymore."

"Ok, but Tifa, you have to understand, you haven't accomplished your goals yet. Are you sure about your decision?"

"**Goodbye, Amanda**," Tifa snapped lightly. "I'll see you in court then." She warned to her therapist as she stormed out of the room, leaving behind a very confused Amanda at the door.


	4. Tifa goes to court for the first time

**_Author's note: Hello guys, I'm almost done with this humor story that I honestly like to write, hope you guys like it, so enjoy and happy reading :)! _**

At approximately 7:30 AM, Tifa soon immediately called her now established lawyer in order to accompany her over to court where she's settling with her own therapist. Tifa just wanted this lawsuit to be settled fair and square so that way she won't be attending anymore therapy sessions in the future, and to spend more time with her husband Cloud and her dearest friend, Aerith. Tifa was sick and tired of the mess that's going on during her own therapy sessions and soon decided that going to court will truly settle it, once and for all!

"Tifa, are you sure you want to do this? This is new and barely legal to our own causes.. in fact, this might be the first time that you've wanted to enter court. Reminder that going to court and having a lawsuit is not going to be really easy, ok?" Tifa's lawyer, Judith, had explained over the phone with Tifa this morning. And of course Tifa really wanted everything to be perfect in order so she will have the last laugh with Amanda. "Come on Judith, I want this to be settled with once and for all.. don't you understand? Being in therapy has been somewhat like a chore for me, everyday.. I just want to be out of it." Tifa said calmly over the phone. "Ok, Tifa, but another quick reminder: you will be the one who might be in charge of all of this. Got it?" Judith told her. "All right, I believe you." Tifa replies back. And soon, the court event had happened quicker than minute rice: Tifa frequently COMPLAINED all over about her older sessions with Amanda, while Amanda tried to frequently defend Tifa and herself by calmly and gently saying that Tifa is one of her best patients due to Tifa being extremely modest and a bit polite. But Tifa BEGGED to differ.

"Are you for real? Are you kidding me? I've almost spent my whole life with this woman with whom I don't even know of all people! You have to reconsider this, seriously." Tifa defended herself again for the thirteenth time. It's now starting to get ridiculous, for heavens sake.. Even the crowd itself in general is starting to get increasingly bored over the same thing a little bit..

Soon, in about fifteen minutes, the judge has decided to let Tifa go from attending her therapy sessions, due to the appeal of the crowd praising Tifa for her true and honest opinions of going to therapy, as while Amanda has to reconsider her faults and mistakes for nearly ruining a patients life, and even Tifa's comments about her own experiences with going to therapy. And **that **patient happens to be Tifa herself, goddamnit!

"YES! I'm out of therapy for good, forever! FINALLY! Tifa yelled in excitement as she merely jumped up and down, as the court session was finally finished. "Goodbye Amanda, have fun for your next therapy patient!" Tifa mocked slightly as she flipped the bird at Amanda while Amanda left in a hurry from a fast city cab. Soon, Tifa can tell the honest to good news about her experience with Amanda to both Cloud and Aerith, since she's now finally free from those endless therapy sessions, it's about damn time!

**_Author's note: The final chapter which is Chapter 5 will be in progress soon, thank you all for reading :), lemme know what you think by PMing me please, thanks again :)!_**


	5. Tifa finally has her freedom

**_Author's note: Here it is guys :)! The final chapter of this quirky story is finally here! Hope you all like it ._**

"Yes!! YES!!" Tifa loudly yelled, as she celebrated by jumping up and down, her dark brown hair cascading all over her shoulders. "Guess what Yuffie? Guess what? I'm not in therapy anymore!! Amanda just called today and told me that my therapy sessions are now over due to low money for paying these therapy sessions. And yes I went to court to settle with Amanda a few days ago, it took forever though. Anyways I'm soo excited and happy because no more therapy for me!! OH HELL YES!!" Tifa shouted, her excitement getting a little bit too much to handle. Yuffie was on the phone with her, for about sixteen minutes of discussing about what Tifa just said to her about her great happiness for not being in therapy anymore. "Congratulations, Tifa," Yuffie said over the phone while Tifa jumped up and down repeatedly. "What are you going to do since you don't have therapy anymore?" Yuffie asked.

"To go to Seventh Heaven and meet up with my friends so we can have such a great time. I miss those days whenever I have a little bit of freedom, you know? I truly cannot wait!!" Tifa said excitedly over the phone. "Well I'm proud of you Tifa. Best of luck to you and have fun!" Yuffie said. "Ok, thank you Yuffie!! I'll see you later!" Tifa said before saying goodbye to Yuffie and preparing herself to go out. She was searching for her black leather blazer that's covered in silver rhinestones and matching leggings through her large closet. Tifa thinks this will be the perfect outfit to go out with her group of friends. "I'm ready for tonight," Tifa said as she lays her choice of clothes right onto her bed before going to the vanity table and putting on her makeup. She was so excited, she could barely contain herself. "I'm soo glad to be out of therapy.. no more Amanda for me." Tifa said as she puts on her light nude lipstick and black blush upon her lucky face. "I have to make sure that I look good for tonight," Tifa said as she soon finishes putting on her makeup. "I'm almost ready," Tifa says as she studied herself in the mirror wearing the diamond encrusted blazer and leggings.

"Zack? Cloud, you there? I'm ready to go, just give me thirteen minutes," Tifa said on her phone as soon as she headed out the main door of her house. She was also elated to see her friends in so long, she did misses her friends' presence. As soon as Tifa reaches the entrance of Seventh Heaven, she was greeted by a warm embrace from Cloud. "Tifa, you look great," Cloud told her as Tifa smiled and entered the bar. "Why thank you Cloud," Tifa replied back with a warm smile. "Looks like everyone is here," Tifa said as she spotted Zack, Yuffie, and Barret lounging upon the loveseats and couches. _Looks like it's going to be a fun party that I'll never forget_, Tifa thought as loud, pop music began to blare while she and everyone else danced vigorously and partied hard to their hearts' content.

**_Author's note: So this short story is now done :), I'd like to move on to new stories and some stories of my own that I haven't finished yet. Lemme know what you guys think of this story that I enjoyed writing :)!! See you all in the next story :)!!_**


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